On Repeat : "MOMENTUM" by The Hush Sound

I just have to say, that I feel...

ALIVE!!!

Because God lives inside of me.
There's a fire burning.
A passion ALIGHT [?]

Ok, so time to explain right?
I spent all night...pretty much finding something that's been dormant from within me for a long time.
Sure, I've had this passion a n d goal to change the world and stuff. I know that I'm going to do big things with my life; especially for God. So, why do I feel so different all of a sudden?

Starting from yesterday:
I got off of work, just like any other day. It's just...another weekend. Really, nothing special...just like my life has been for close to a year now...very : M O N O T O N O U S !

I spend the day, from 730 in the morning till 230 in the afternoon...just...messing with the computer. Everything is normal. Just like it has been.

. . .
With me...

...
Feeling...

Really. . .

. . .T i r e d.

I wake up at 7...but lie around till 920. Really...there's no reason to get up. Might as well stay asleep...if I could. I mean...I could see a movie...but...what's the point.

WHAT'S THE POINT?!?!
(not angry...it's the truth)

But I get up anyway. So I can mess on the computer more. Watch some more "Heroes" because it's such an addicting show. I really like it...you know...Destiny...and all that.
Little do I know...I'll find myself sitting there.
Staring at my screen.
Myspace homepage...just staring.
Not moving.

For a good...10 minutes.

Listening to music...
Then I hear the words...

"All we need...is a little bit of mom-en-tum.
Break down these walls
That we've built around ourselves

All we need...is a little bit of In-er-tia
Break down and tell...
Break down and tell."

Ya...I know.

So, here we are.
Doing nothing special.
I have not hit an "All time low." Though I am a bit
L

o

w

needless to say.

Feeling like I'm going no where.
I haven't been the person I once claimed to be.
Happy.
Living to the fullest.
Side-by-Side with Christ.

For a couple of weeks...I've slowly gained...for lack of a better word...Momentum.

Passions I've once had...have resurfaced.
Finally past all the junk that's been happening to me...I'm ready to start moving forward again. I can't explain it, but it's there. I want to learn from God, from other people. To be inspired, and I want to start projects and change lives and start a movement.

Something sparked last night.

It wasn't like God suddenly spoke out in a booming voice...or burst forth in a blast of light.
He had been whispering in my ear.
Over.
and over.
and over.
and over and over and over and over and all friggin over that I just couldn't ignore it anymore couldn't get it out of my head couldn't deny that he was ready to be with me again and to talk with me again and to see me dancing and singing and living ONE and ONLY for HIM.

But it was only a whisper.
August.12.2007.

It's not Salvation.
It's not Repentance.
It's not Healing with the HOLY FRIGGIN SPIRIT.

It was being tired of the monotony. It was letting go of worldly issues. It was feeling his hand upon my shoulder. Squeezing tightly. Saying to me that it's time.

I haven't slept since.
Visiting web sites that I knew existed for God...starting with Hillsongunited.com
Going to Barnes and Noble to finally pick up something from the "Christian Inspiration" Section.
I have a need to be inspired...to learn and watch how others do it.
My goal...to change Christians around the world.
Not save the lost.
Not bring those to Christ (though I have no doubt that will happen along the way on both accounts)

How can people save the lost...if those that have been saved...are still:

[stuggling]
[trying]
[searching]

Lost...themselves?

It's just not possible.

They say we are the generation. But I see too many Christians struggling so much just to get by...just to understand what God's plan is for them...that they are slowly falling by the wayside.

(And from what I hear...the wayside isn't a fun place to be.)

I didn't plan on writing this blog like this...from beginning to end.
All it is...it's just words.
Empty...words.

For people that haven't felt what I've been feeling for 12 hours and counting now.
I will wake up every day...and be in a constant walk with God.

There's more to say...but not on this subject.

Just know, that I won't rest till the end.
I won't stop again.
This I promise you.
I will help this generation...be the generation.

I will lead them...like David.

This.
I promise.
You. <---I AM