Published on
October 28, 2010

I wanted to tell you a story that is a good example of creating meaningful relationships, using the steps I outlined in Part One.  Since that post was getting too long, I decided I'd split it up, so if you weren't too interested in former post, then don't worry about this one.  It probably won't interest you.  Regardless, I believe it's an interesting example considering this story comes from an experience I had many years ago, when I hadn't developed these steps or even thought about my life as a formula.  I just lived, and this is the result.

Tobias was a foreign exchange my senior year of high school.  We became fast friends, and as I lived in a small town and felt bad that he had to experience America in one of the most boring places in Texas, we hung out a lot to create a more meaningful experience.  Homecoming dance was coming up at the school, and he had developed a small crush on a girl, Lauren, in our Choir class, and wanted to ask her out.  Now I knew Lauren, so I was able to help in this situation.  Tobias and I decided we should all hang out one day in order for them to both get to know one another, and we both agreed that she should have someone else there so she can be herself and it won't be awkward for her to be hanging with two guys.  Enter Laura, Lauren's best friend, someone I also have known for quite a while.

The problem was, despite my dashing good looks and irresistible charm, Laura was notorious for finding ways to turn me down, and this situation became no different.  First she mentioned homework; this was a staple of hers and you can see now why I mentioned it in the first blog.  We convinced her that wasn't as important, and so she said that me and Tobi should call her when we're ready to hang out.  This we did, only to have her give us the excuse that she was shopping with her sister and her Aunt would probably say no, so we should probably just go without her.  I didn't buy this for a second.  We told Lauren we'd be a little late meeting up with her, and I formulated a plan.

We drove to Laura's house, and I parked down the street just in case she would recognize my car.  We knocked on the door, her Aunt answered, and we went inside where I filled her in on everything that was going on.  Personally, I was tired of being turned down, so I decided to take matters into my own hands.  Surprisingly, Laura's Aunt was on my side, and said she had no clue as to why Laura would think she wouldn't be allowed out.  So we waited for Laura to arrive, and with no more excuses and her Aunt telling her to go out with these "nice young boys", she had no choice.

This is off subject, but ladies, I'll tell you what.  If make-up/shower/being dressed "properly" is also an excuse to not hang out with some fun folks, then you're going to get my official stamp of disapproval.  Those excuses are lame.  Guys do not care if you're not prettied up.  We like you just the same.  Back to the story.

So with that mission accomplished we were off to meet with Lauren.  Our destination - Go Karts, Batting Cages, and Put-Put Golf.  We took two cars.  Tobi and I reveled at our good luck and we knew he would get his chance tonight, but upon arrival at Triple Play we unfortunately found that it was closed.  I think it rained or something.  Can't remember.  My quick thinking suggested we do bowling instead, and so we were off for a fun time at the bowling alley.  You know how it goes.  Guys vs Girls, teasing one another because one of the guys is German and the two girls are blonde...it happens.

I'm sure after bowling we could've called it a night, but we didn't want to end it there, at least not me and Tobi.  So I believe we went out to a movie...or ice cream...you know, we probably did both.  No...wait...we went to eat pizza.  The ice cream and Movie was another night, surprisingly.  Who knows anymore.  Regardless, all I know is that we had probably the most memorable night of that half of the school year.  Later on I took Laura home, and Lauren took Tobi, the perfect opportunity for him to ask the dreaded question, and also the perfect chance for me to tell Laura "I told you so."

Tobi got a yes.
I got a "whatever Matt".

Yet I was still smiling, even to this day.

When you take initiative.
When you stop making lame excuses.
When you never call it a night too early.
And when you allow yourself to share the moment with multiple people.

It's amazing what meaningful relationships you can create, and along with that some wonderful memories.   Those steps, if I put it to the test in every moment in the past where I have my fondest of memories, I notice are present in some form or another.  So take a moment to ask yourself if there's something you can work on, this Art of Creating Meaningful Relationships, to improve your social interaction.  Don't worry about the past or future, and just live in the moment, and you'll be surprised what comes of it.  I know I didn't tackle the whole "don't know how to be single" issue, but that's why this is an ongoing conversation, and quite possibly something to build on.

What do you think?

Is there anything I left out?

Mattias is an actor, writer, filmmaker, and editor currently living in Los Angeles, CA. He often writes about his observations about life, the human condition, spirituality, and relationships. He also enjoys writing about movies, pop culture, formula one, and current events. Often these writings are 'initial thoughts' and un-edited, as authentic as possible, and should be considered opinions. If you're interested in commenting on his work, or continuing the conversation, you should consider following him on Twitter or share an article on social media, where he would love to engage even further. Consider subscribing via RSS for more.